Archive for November, 2009
Childcare Tip of the Week #2 — Creating Structure & Routine
| 1 Comment |Posted by: Amy Bryan on November 23, 2009
TIP #2: Provide kids with a predictable daily routine.
Providing Structure and Routine Throughout the Day
Children, regardless of age, need to have a daily routine. Children tend to thrive much better by knowing what is coming and what will happen each day. I’m sure your host families have already established routines with their children, such as morning and bedtime routines, but why not use that same idea in your daily interactions with them?You may find they will be much easier to deal with, if they have some structure throughout the day.
The following article may help you see the reasons behind this.
Create a Daily Home Schedule to Provide Routine and Structure for your Children
By: Simplified Spaces | Posted: 05th February 2009
Copyright (c) 2009 Simplified Space
Devoting time to establish consistency and structure is often one of the biggest challenges that parents face when trying to teach responsibility to their children. Life skills are best learned by example and repetition, meaning that consistency is of utmost importance in building the skills that your children will need in the future in order to survive successfully in today’s society.
While imposing a daily home schedule may seem restrictive, the opposite is actually true. Children need to be able to depend on the adults in their lives and they feel safe and secure when they have a structure and routine to count on. Children do not yet have the maturity level to know how to structure their time on their own. They learn these skills from institutions like school and from the adults in their lives. For the parents, establishing a family schedule provides consistency and routine in a busy household. Consider our society in general, and you will find time schedules regulating most everything we do. Companies have standard hours, schools offer classes with a defined beginning and end, and mass transportation runs on a tight, proven schedule that is dependable to all who use it.
By establishing and posting a daily schedule in your home that includes chores and times that tasks are expected to be performed and completed, you are providing the structure and consistency that your children need in order to grow and mature. Schedules at home help regulate your children’s lives so that they have a model to learn from that they can take into their adult lives.
Start with a morning routine that includes daily tasks required to get ready for a new day. Have a set time to be out of bed and a list of preparatory activities, including getting dressed, brushing teeth, and combing hair. Give a reasonable time frame to complete these activities, and require the children to be at the breakfast table by a certain time.
After breakfast, allow time for checking that all school supplies and homework are properly stored in backpacks and any accessories - gloves, jackets, etc - can be donned in time to either get in the car or meet the school bus. Once you have set a morning regime, it is time to work out the evening plans, outlining homework time, mealtime, showers, chores, and any other activities that are involved in daily life, while still maintaining a consistent bedtime. We are a sleep deprived culture. Make efforts not to pass this way of life on to the next generation.
Establishing a visible daily schedule for your children to follow provides consistency and a foundation from which they can build on. It will also help you with organizing your own day because you will now have a structure and schedule to manage your time effectively and efficiently as well. With a daily schedule in place for the adults, prevents you from having to reinvent the wheel every day. All family members know the routine and in that they learn and can trust. Providing these routines and structure for your children while they are young not only provides them with a model of how to manage a home and how to perform routine home tasks, but it also helps them develop critical time management life skills that are essential to later life success.
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Janet Nusbaum (AKA the Organizing Genie), WAHM of two, is an Organizing Consultant, Speaker & Author of ‘Mom, Can I Help Around the House? A Simple Step-by-step System for Teaching your Children Life-long Skills for Pitching in & Picking up’. Grab a FREE chapter of her book & household chore system by visiting http://www.KidsandChores.net . Get even more organizing & family management help by visting her blog: http://www.TheOrganizingGenie.com
This article is free for republishing
Printed From: http://www.articlealley.com/article_779248_27.html
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Here is a sample schedule you could have for your kids (and yourself!) each day! You can use your Daily Communication Log to write down what you plan to do with the kids, either at your weekly meeting with your host family, or plan ahead for the next day at the end of each day that you work.
You can structure your day however you and your host family wish—this is simply an example to help you, if you need it 
Morning Schedule:
8:00 am – Give children breakfast and eat with them. Ask them what they want to do that day, or what they will do in school that day, etc. If they are old enough to do so, ask them to help you clean up afterwards (even little kids can help with this, and like to be helpers).
8:30 am – Play time. (Play with them, don’t just watch :).
9:30 am – Play a game with them. Teach them a game from your home country; play hide and seek, play outside—be creative. Plan a play date with an au pair friend, where you both get to interact with them.
10:30 am – Quiet time. This could be spent reading books with them, making up stories with them, coloring with them. If parents allow TV time, you could watch a show or DVD with them.
11:30 am – Lunch time. Have the children help and eat with them. Use lunch time to teach them a new word in your native language (maybe do one new word a day with them—for example, different food items like milk; utensils, things in the room, etc).Introduce them to something you might eat for lunch back home. Have them tell their parents the new word you taught them at dinner.
AFTERNOON SCHEDULE:
12:00 pm – Nap time. Use this time to do any chores such as laundry that you have to do. This is also an appropriate time to check email / Facebook, make any phone calls, if you don’t have any chores that need to be done.
2:00 pm – Craft / Fun time. Use the ideas on my Lesson Plan page or come up with your own. This could also be another time to plan a playdate and do a craft, outing or activity together with an au pair friend. You could also plan a fun outing on your own, perhaps to the library, the park, the playground, a museum…
Pretty soon, your day is done and you can relax or go out with your friends. Obviously, if your kids are in school or are babies, your daily schedules and routines will be different, but I hope this will help you anyway, especially with school vacations coming up.
I hope this will give you some help and maybe some ideas too! If you haven’t set up a daily routine, a good time to start may be after the Thanksgiving holiday!
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What’s the best way to handle my au pair’s curfew?
No Comment |Posted by: Amy Bryan on November 16, 2009
While your au pair’s primary responsibility while she is here is to care for your children, she is also here to make new friends, explore the U.S. and become more independent. So, it can be tricky to determine by what time she needs to be home each night. Watch this video to learn ways to ensure that your au pair’s curfew is fair to both your family and your au pair.
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Welcome, Malin!
No Comment |Posted by: Amy Bryan on November 16, 2009
Malin has joined us here in the First State from her home country of Sweden. She will be living with her host family in Bear and caring for three boys. She is with Ariel’s host family.
I know you all met her at the meeting, but I hope you will meet up outside of that and show her around! Her contact info is on the “Au Pair Contact List” page. If you need the password for this, you must email me!
Welcome to Delaware, Malin! We hope you have a great year and I look forward to getting to know you!
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How Much Time Should I Be Spending With My Au Pair?
No Comment |Posted by: Amy Bryan on November 16, 2009
How much time should I be spending with my au pair?
Families often wonder how much time they should spend with their au pairs. There is no magic formula because every situation is different, but there are some general guidelines.
Because the au pair program is a cultural exchange program, au pairs expect to be part of an American family – meals, holiday, family activities. But your au pair will also want to be with her friends and experience American culture outside of your home. Through understanding and communication, you can find a balance that works for both of you. Watch the video to learn more.
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Dress for Success!
No Comment |Posted by: Amy Bryan on November 16, 2009
The issue of appropriate au pair attire during working hours is something I have often been asked about. As au pairs have different fashion tastes as well as different ideas of what they may consider appropriate, it can be helpful to review this issue at your monthly meeting to provide them with some perspective they may not have considered. While many au pairs may dress in what is “comfortable” to them, it’s important that they consider the message they may be sending to the children in their charge as well as to their host family. The recent change in seasons represents a great example of this. The au pair serves as a role model for the host children and as the weather gets colder, it’s helpful if they dress in more seasonally appropriate clothing so that the children make that shift as well. Children often want to continue to wear their summer wardrobe despite the dipping temperatures outside, but if an au pair continues to wear tank tops and flip flops, it can be hard to have them understand why they are the only ones who need to dress for winter. In addition, the family may worry that if an au pair is not dressing in warm enough clothing themselves, they may not be making it a priority for the children to dress warmly enough either. While au pairs are adults and are certainly free to make their own choices regarding clothing, they may not realize that those choices may impact more than just themselves. Providing them with some practical advice in this regard may help to avoid some uncomfortable conversations between families and au pairs and to give them the chance to dress for success.
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November Meeting–See what we learned!
| 1 Comment |Posted by: Amy Bryan on November 16, 2009
Thank you to all my au pairs for coming! We had perfect attendance this month–way to go!
Our November meeting was our seasonal Continuing Education Unit and we discussed the dangers of household poisoning. We talked about items that could be found in various parts of the home that could prove harmful to young children, followed by a clip from the “Today Show,” which further reinforced how easy it can be for young children to be in danger of poisoning in the home.
We then played a game called “Trick or Treat,” in which the au pairs had to look at two pictures and decide which picture was candy or something safe (the “treat”); this was a difficult challenge which I hope really drove home how easy it could be for a young child to ingest something harmful without knowing.
How well would you do?? Here is an example…
Which one is candy? The answer is at the bottom of this post!
We also discussed what to do in case of an unintentional poisoning in the home. Au pairs were given handouts with a safety checklist, local poison control centers and a list of items to check off to ensure your home is safe. Click on the link below to see!
***The first picture is aspirin–the second picture is Smarties. Could you tell the difference? Could a small child??
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Childcare Tip of the Week #1 — Positive Reinforcement
No Comment |Posted by: Amy Bryan on November 16, 2009
TIP #1: Be positive with your kids!
The following article comes from FamilyEducation.com and talks about the importance of using positive reinforcement with children. There are also some very helpful tips in dealing with children and getting them to behave using this method. Studies have shown that being negative towards a child when disciplining them can have ill effects later in life. (As a former high school teacher, I have seen this first hand!)
The second item is called “101 Ways to Praise A Child.” Try to incorporate these in your daily routine–can you use one at least once a day?
Using Positive Reinforcement
by Brenda L. Gargus
“If a child lives with approval, he learns to live with himself.”
Dorothy Law Nolte
After a long day at the office, with more work facing you at home, the last thing you might feel like doing is being positive. But it is crucial that, even during conversations aimed at correcting behavior, you keep your tone positive.
What is positive communication?
Positive communication is a tool to reinforce good behavior and eliminate bad behavior; it builds self-esteem and inspires confidence in children. And it’s easy — once you get the hang of it! Children’s feelings of esteem are very highly influenced by their interaction and relationship with their parents. All children need to feel loved and accepted, and you can communicate those feelings to your children by the way you speak.
Once you develop the habit of consistent positive reinforcement at home, you’ll see that communicating is easier, and you will also be helping your son or daughter learn to communicate with the outside world. By the time they are in elementary school, kids need the self-esteem boost gained when positive reinforcement is in practice.
Rules of the road
- Face your child and maintain eye contact.
- Always allow your child to finish talking and complete his statements.
- “Labeling is disabling” — label the behavior instead of the child. Incorrect: “Billy, you are a bad boy.” Correct: “Billy, it is irresponsible to leave your toys all over the place.”
- Help your child learn to talk positively.
- Try to start your statements with a reinforcer, such as, “Sara, you are a very bright girl; now, let’s talk about the best way to get your homework finished.” People are more responsive to positive statements, but make sure your compliments are truthful. Children, as well as adults, will see through false flattery.
Correcting behavior
In the book Meta-Emotion: How Families Communicate Emotionally, by John M. Gottman, Lynn Fainsilber Katz, and Carole Hooven, the authors discuss educator and psychologist Dr. Haim Ginott’s basic plan for positive reinforcement. The four basic parts are:
- Recognize and acknowledge the child’s wish.
- State the limit calmly and clearly.
- Point out ways that her wish may be partially fulfilled.
- Help the child express the resentment that arises when limits are imposed. “I know you would like to watch the TV show now, but we will tape it and you can watch it after your homework.”
Try this at home
Here are some time-tested hints for positive communication with your child.
- Be firm and consistent.
- Try not to force petty, time-consuming decisions, such as “Which color toothbrush do you want?”
- Give your child chores when she’s young. Chores build self-discipline and a sense of responsibility, but remember that she may need many calm reminders to complete them.
- Accept the fact that children need to be told things over and over. If you have to repeat a direction, say it as if it were the first time.
- A short list of chores is better than a long, possibly confusing or frustating list. In general, lists (in either words or pictures) are better than simply telling your child what to do, because a list addresses two learning styles — auditory and visual — and a list lets your child be in control by checking off each task as he completes it.
- Remember that some kids do not process multiple requests quickly or accurately. Get your child’s attention first, and never shout from one room to the other.
- Speak slowly; it will help your child absorb more of what you are saying.
- If your child has a learning disability, she may be disorganized, and may have trouble relating an event in proper sequence. Keep a calm, uncritical, and non-irritable manner when explaining something to your child.
James Baldwin once said, “Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.” By being positive with your child and reinforcing the behavior you want repeated, you give her the blueprint for interacting with people outside of your home.
101 Ways to Praise a Child! (Author Unknown)
WOW • WAY TO GO • SUPER • YOU’RE SPECIAL • OUTSTANDING • EXCELLENT •
GREAT• GOOD • NEAT • WELL DONE • REMARKABLE • I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT • I’M PROUD OF YOU •FANTASTIC • SUPER STAR • NICE WORK • LOOKING GOOD • YOU’RE ON TOP OF IT • BEAUTIFUL • NOW YOU’RE FLYING • YOU’RE CATCHING ON • NOW YOU’VE GOT IT • YOU’RE INCREDIBLE • BRAVO • YOU’RE FANTASTIC • HURRAY FOR YOU • YOU’RE ON TARGET • YOU’RE ON YOUR WAY • HOW NICE • HOW SMART •GOOD JOB • THAT’S INCREDIBLE • HOT DOG •DYNAMITE • YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL • YOU’RE UNIQUE • NOTHING CAN STOP YOU NOW • GOOD FOR YOU • I LIKE YOU YOU’RE A WINNER • REMARKABLE JOB •BEAUTIFUL WORK • SPECTACULAR • YOU’RE SPECTACULAR • YOU’RE DARLING • YOU’RE PRECIOUS • GREAT DISCOVERY • YOU’VE DISCOVERED THE SECRET • YOU FIGURED IT OUT • FANTASTIC JOB • HIP, HIP, HURRAY • BINGO • MAGNIFICENT • MARVELOUS • TERRIFIC • YOU’RE IMPORTANT • PHENOMENAL • YOU’RE SENSATIONAL • SUPER WORK • CREATIVE JOB • SUPER JOB • FANTASTIC JOB • EXCEPTIONAL PERFORMANCE • YOU’RE A REAL TROOPER • YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE • YOU ARE EXCITING • YOU LEARNED IT RIGHT • WHAT AN IMAGINATION •WHAT A GOOD LISTENER • YOU ARE FUN • YOU’RE GROWING UP• YOU TRIED HARD • YOU CARE • BEAUTIFUL SHARING • OUTSTANDING PERFORMANCE • YOU’RE A GOOD FRIEND • I TRUST YOU • YOU’RE IMPORTANT • YOU MEAN A LOT TO ME • YOU MAKE ME HAPPY • YOU BELONG •YOU’VE GOT A FRIEND • YOU MAKE ME LAUGH • YOU BRIGHTEN MY DAY • I RESPECT YOU • YOU MEAN THE WORLD TO ME • THAT’S CORRECT • YOU’RE A JOY • YOU’RE A TREASURE • YOU’RE WONDERFUL • YOU’RE PERFECT • AWESOME • A+ JOB •YOU’RE A-OK MY BUDDY • YOU MADE MY DAY • THAT’S THE BEST • A BIG HUG • A BIG KISS • SAY I LOVE YOU!
The above comes from WorkingParents.com.
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